+--------------------------------------------------------------------+
| Where Does a Geek Find a Social Life?                              |
|   from the meet-space dept.                                        |
|   posted by kdawson on Sunday June 21, @22:57 (Social Networks)    |
|   http://tech.slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=09/06/21/1954215         |
+--------------------------------------------------------------------+

[0]JustShootMe writes "I have a question for my fellow Slashdotters, and
yes, I realize I am entering the lion's den covered in tasty
meat-flavored sauce. I have never been a very social person, preferring
to throw myself into technology; therefore, I've been spectacularly
unsuccessful in developing any meaningful interpersonal relationships.
Lately I have begun to feel that this situation is not tenable, and I
would like to fix it. But I really don't know how and haven't the
faintest idea where to start. I know that I am in the minority and that
there are many different kinds of Slashdot readers, most of whom have
more experience in this realm than I do. So please tell me: how, and more
importantly, where do you meet fellow geeks — preferably including some
of the opposite gender — in meatspace?"

Discuss this story at:
    http://tech.slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=09/06/21/1954215

Links:
    0. mailto:rmiller at duskglow.com



有的人这样建议：

    Assuming guy looking for women: church, craft stores and shows,
    classical music concerts (musicians), amateur theater, Mac computer
    organizations have more women, Word SIGs, camera clubs, community
    college night courses. Married co-workers' wives have single
    friends. Volunteer groups, food banks, Salvation Army,

我觉得好，但是那是西方。在中国呢？想必本论坛里有不少人想知道。

多抄一些出来。

JustShootMe writes 


>  how, and more
> importantly, where do you meet fellow geeks — preferably including some
> of the opposite gender — in meatspace?"
>
>   
又有人说：

    First of all you should realize that you're not going to be very
    good at it. Like any skill it takes practice. So you might start out
    by finding some group of people that are tolerable but are probably
    *not* the people you'll want to actually spend time with. That way
    you can learn without "spoiling" the group you really want to know.

    Some key things:

        * Be clean.
        * Learn how to listen, even when what's being said is not the
          most interesting thing in the world.
        * Be interested in their lives. Ask questions. Remember the answers.
        * If you're speaking with a female and she is telling you her
          troubles, sympathize, but do *not* offer suggestions. Ask her
          about her feelings. She doesn't want you to fix it, she wants
          you to listen. This is a very powerful point.
        * Be prepared to be thoroughly bored from time to time. There's
          no getting around it - if you want to be sociable there will
          be times when it seems like a huge waste of time. And you'll
          be right. But it's the price of entry.

又有：

    First of all, don't talk like you do in your summary. Using overly
    precise words will freak normal people out (Geeks tend to find it
    pretentious, as well.) Find a local geek hangout spot, hang back and
    observe. Smile when something is amusing, laugh when it's funny. Say
    nothing until you feel comfortable. Do this until you are having a
    conversation. Repeat conversations until you are invited to
    activities with people. Repeat until you have friends. But most of
    all, throw your research away, stop asking Slashdot like you're
    preparing a technical writeup...and Relax! People are fun.

又有：

    Why limit yourself to geeks? I spent years at various Universities
    trying and failing to meet women and it wasn't until I started doing
    stuff outside of my normal group that I did. I took up figure
    skating of all things and met my future wife. Now you may ask why a
    red blooded male would take up figure skating. Same reason I did
    cookery at school. No red blooded male would do them so there were
    loads of females and no competition.

    Get out, take up a social activity. A friend of mine in a similar
    situation took up dancing and ended up meeting lots of girls too.

2009/6/23 Zhang Weiwu <zhangweiwu在realss.com>

> 多抄一些出来。
>
> JustShootMe writes
>
>
> >  how, and more
> > importantly, where do you meet fellow geeks — preferably including some
> > of the opposite gender — in meatspace?"
> >
> >
> 又有人说：
>
>    First of all you should realize that you're not going to be very
>    good at it. Like any skill it takes practice. So you might start out
>    by finding some group of people that are tolerable but are probably
>    *not* the people you'll want to actually spend time with. That way
>    you can learn without "spoiling" the group you really want to know.
>
>    Some key things:
>
>        * Be clean.
>        * Learn how to listen, even when what's being said is not the
>          most interesting thing in the world.
>        * Be interested in their lives. Ask questions. Remember the answers.
>        * If you're speaking with a female and she is telling you her
>          troubles, sympathize, but do *not* offer suggestions. Ask her
>          about her feelings. She doesn't want you to fix it, she wants
>          you to listen. This is a very powerful point.
>        * Be prepared to be thoroughly bored from time to time. There's
>          no getting around it - if you want to be sociable there will
>          be times when it seems like a huge waste of time. And you'll
>          be right. But it's the price of entry.
>
> 又有：
>
>    First of all, don't talk like you do in your summary. Using overly
>    precise words will freak normal people out (Geeks tend to find it
>    pretentious, as well.) Find a local geek hangout spot, hang back and
>    observe. Smile when something is amusing, laugh when it's funny. Say
>    nothing until you feel comfortable. Do this until you are having a
>    conversation. Repeat conversations until you are invited to
>    activities with people. Repeat until you have friends. But most of
>    all, throw your research away, stop asking Slashdot like you're
>    preparing a technical writeup...and Relax! People are fun.
>
> 又有：
>
>    Why limit yourself to geeks? I spent years at various Universities
>    trying and failing to meet women and it wasn't until I started doing
>    stuff outside of my normal group that I did. I took up figure
>    skating of all things and met my future wife. Now you may ask why a
>    red blooded male would take up figure skating. Same reason I did
>    cookery at school. No red blooded male would do them so there were
>    loads of females and no competition.
>
>    Get out, take up a social activity. A friend of mine in a similar
>    situation took up dancing and ended up meeting lots of girls too.
>
> _______________________________________________
> zeuux-universe mailing list
> zeuux-universe在zeuux.org
> http://www.zeuux.org/mailman/listinfo/zeuux-universe
>
> ZEUUX Project - Free Software, Free Society!
> http://www.zeuux.org
>

谢谢分享。很有趣。

-- 

Alex Chan
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好问题，我也想知道大家的想法。发散一下，放松一下吧。

Zhang Weiwu 写道:
> +--------------------------------------------------------------------+
> | Where Does a Geek Find a Social Life?                              |
> |   from the meet-space dept.                                        |
> |   posted by kdawson on Sunday June 21, @22:57 (Social Networks)    |
> |   http://tech.slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=09/06/21/1954215         |
> +--------------------------------------------------------------------+
>
> [0]JustShootMe writes "I have a question for my fellow Slashdotters, and
> yes, I realize I am entering the lion's den covered in tasty
> meat-flavored sauce. I have never been a very social person, preferring
> to throw myself into technology; therefore, I've been spectacularly
> unsuccessful in developing any meaningful interpersonal relationships.
> Lately I have begun to feel that this situation is not tenable, and I
> would like to fix it. But I really don't know how and haven't the
> faintest idea where to start. I know that I am in the minority and that
> there are many different kinds of Slashdot readers, most of whom have
> more experience in this realm than I do. So please tell me: how, and more
> importantly, where do you meet fellow geeks — preferably including some
> of the opposite gender — in meatspace?"
>
> Discuss this story at:
>     http://tech.slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=09/06/21/1954215
>
> Links:
>     0. mailto:rmiller在duskglow.com
>
>
>
> 有的人这样建议：
>
>     Assuming guy looking for women: church, craft stores and shows,
>     classical music concerts (musicians), amateur theater, Mac computer
>     organizations have more women, Word SIGs, camera clubs, community
>     college night courses. Married co-workers' wives have single
>     friends. Volunteer groups, food banks, Salvation Army,
>
> 我觉得好，但是那是西方。在中国呢？想必本论坛里有不少人想知道。
> _______________________________________________
> zeuux-universe mailing list
> zeuux-universe在zeuux.org
> http://www.zeuux.org/mailman/listinfo/zeuux-universe
>
> ZEUUX Project - Free Software, Free Society!
> http://www.zeuux.org